May Day Mayday!

Mayday! Mayday! The freezer isn’t working,
the printer doesn’t print and the toilet
paper disappeared! HELP!!!!!

Dot dot dot dash dash dash dot dot dot
Who has the key to my front door?
The scientist? The politician? The TV talking head?
Some kid brought my fast food and left it on the porch.
I hope the cook wrapped the vaccine in bacon.

Mayday, mayday! I have all this
dog food, but no dog. Help,
here come the crows! Will they eat it?

Mayday, mayday! I can’t
find my coffee cup so
the windows won’t open. Help!

Help I need somebody! The Beatles screamed
I screamed back decades later
All you need is love.

Mayday, mayday! My mental heath
is a mess. Friends? Wine? Yes!

Princess Tabitha sound asleep in her crate
She looks so innocent but don’t be fooled
She’s a tiger in disguise. Mayday!

Mayday! Mayday! The purple
leprechauns replaced my brain
with tater tots to negotiate with
the alien Elvis impersonators
for the return of their missing left socks.

Not a nibble of chocolate in sight.
“Dire consequences,” gurgled the washer
as it devoured all the socks.

Wear Mork & Mindy face masks
and My Favorite Martian gloves.

Binge-watching the TV,
Read all my books
Pulled all the weeds
Cleaned crannies and nooks
Planted the garden
Washed the dog, even clipped it
Still can’t go shopping
Still haven’t whipped it
Waxed all the floors
Cleaned out the closet
“Tidy” doesn’t fit me
It’s the virus that caused it
Mayday, Save me, Mayday.

Mayday! Mayday! Feeling
too comfy inside, forgetting
how it was to live outside!

Mayday, come and help me! The carpet
under my feet is not grassy enough,
the wood floors not like dirt, my tendrils
are reaching for oranges and flowers,
my roots still waiting for water from the clouds.

Mayday! Mayday! All the chickens are gone!
All the chilies are gone! All the garlic is gone!
OK. I don’t need the toilet paper after all.

Original prompt: Write a poem about May Day, mayday mayday!

Barbara Berg, Natalie Champion, Kamelyta Noor, Kris Lovekin, James Luna, Burcu Misirli Chatham, Juanita E. Mantz Pelaez, Cati Porter, Dar Stone, Raine Lefaivre-Naggi, Tom Vaden, Debby Johnson, Gudelia Vaden, Cindy Bousquet Harris

Pandemic Pantoum

Tediously familiar, each déjà vu
I pile them slowly, brick by brick
Morning espresso, evening beer for two
Listening to metered time, tick, tick, tick

I pile them slowly, brick by brick
Morning coffee and oatmeal for two,
Listening to metered time, tick, tick, tick
My daughter is gifting me a colorful mask, whoo!

Morning coffee and oatmeal for two,
Daydreaming of when there’s no fear of the sick.
My daughter is gifting me a colorful mask, whoo!
Did the first two months of the Pandemic

Daydreaming of when there’s no fear of the sick.
Spring is here but little left to do.
Did the first two months of the Pandemic
Buying cheap gas, $2.19, whoo hoo!

Spring is here but little left to do.
May not see it again, so fill it up quick
Buying cheap gas, $2.19, whoo hoo
What about watching tonight a chick flick?

May not see it again, so fill it up quick.
Pudgy little fingers and a delightful coo.
What about watching tonight a chick flick?
I hear, I see, “chirp chirp,” “bark,” but no moo.

Pudgy little fingers and a delightful coo.
Princess Tabitha’s claws click click click.
I hear, I see, “chirp chirp,” “bark,” but no moo.
She said, “it’s a nice pick.”

Princess Tabitha’s claws click click click.
Morning espresso, evening beer for two.
She said, “it’s a nice pick.”
Tediously familiar, each déjà vu.

Original prompt: Write two lines of poetry, one with an -ick ending and one with an -ooh ending, to piece together into a pantoum.

by Natalie Champion, Gudelia Vaden, Nan Friedley, Juanita Mantz, Debby Johnson, Dar Stone, Barbara Berg, Burcu Misirli Chatham,